Going, going, gone!

Anyone want a pair of underachieving WRs in Chad Ocho Cinco Johnson and/or Donald Driver? Bidding will start at a candy bar.

Andrew Yeh Relieved of Duties

PALO ALTO, Calif. – Detroit Lions Proper Villains Owner and Chairman William Clay Ford Andrew Yeh announced today that Matt Millen Andrew Yeh has been relieved of his duties as President and CEO effective immediately.

“I have relieved Matt Millen Andrew Yeh of his duties effective immediately,” said Ford Yeh. “I believe that this decision is in the best interest of this organization. I appreciate Matt Andrew’s efforts. Matt Andrew worked tirelessly during his tenure to win, and he would be the first one to tell you that you have to win in this league. It just didn’t work out.

“The support of our fans continues to be incredible and they deserve a winner. Every decision we make must focus on that goal, and I believe this decision today will allow this team to move forward in a positive manner.

“I am very disappointed with where we are as a team after our start this season. Our sole focus now is preparing for our next game against Chicago Julius de la Berg. The entire organization must work together and do whatever we can to make this a successful season. Despite our record, it is still early and there is time to turn this season around.

“These decisions are for the duration of the 2008 season. Once the season is over, we will undergo a thorough and comprehensive evaluation of our entire football operation and put together a plan that we believe will transform this team into a winner.”

Week 3 Update

Dufresne

This is turning into a two-team race, with Eddy and Jason holding two-game leads over the rest of the league. For the third straight game, Eddy gets the Heineken with a 57-point wipeout of Nalu (see what I did there?). Jason kept pace with the second-highest score of the week, good enough to top Amer, who scored enough to beat anyone else. Go ask Dean for some sympathy. He's been the unlucky loser so far, but he finally got off the schneid with a big win over Russell, and Matt got his first win of the season as well, over Drew.

Montoya

Gina and I were watching MNF, and her game against Jeremy was well in hand. LT was ineffective. Then Sproles broke a few nice runs, including a nifty 15-yarder to the 1. In comes LT for the TD. No problem, still a big enough lead, and the game is winding down. The Chargers are killing clock, and LT's out. Then Rivers completes a meaningless 40-yard pass to Jackson, who gets dragged down at the 1. In comes LT for the TD. Jeremy gets his first win and hands Gina her first loss.

In the big matchup of the week, Lisa took down Hubert to claim first place. Scott claimed yet another Heineken in taking down DanFran, completing a sweep of the previously unbeatens. There are now five teams at 2-1. And in a matchup of the happless, er, winless, I beat Andrew to avoid having the only winless team in either premier league... which means Andrew now has the only winless team in either premier league. He's already loading up for his annual Cup run.

Markinson

In the battle for first, Jason took me down and in the process moved to 3-0 in both leagues! Whoosh scored the Heineken in a 71-point beat down of Dean to move into second place. Scott and Matt pounded Amer and Hubert for their first wins of the season, leaving Hubert as the only one looking for his first win. Dang, Hubert, it's like you had Andrew draft for you or something.

Record Watch

With his double perfect start, Jason continues to climb the career wins ladder, but he's still fourth behind Dean, Hubert, and Scott.

Amer's rough week cost him the career PPG record, which Scott gladly took. Scott also has some breathing room in career points after his lead over Dean slipped to just four last week. And with his top score in Montoya this week, Scott also increased his career Heineken lead to four.

Speaking of Heinekens, Eddy's on pace for 14 this season!

My win streak in Markinson came to an end, leaving me tied with Hubert for the record. Damn, I was hoping to erase him forever. The longest active win streak in each league is now 3 by Jason in Markinson, 3 by Jason and Eddy in Dufresne, and 2 by Lisa in Montoya. Something tells me Scott's not losing any sleep over anyone besting his record 13-game win streak. No one's ever gotten even halfway there. I wonder if he'll pop champagne when Eddy and Jason suffer their first losses this year.

Week 2 Update

Dufresne

What has gotten into Eddy? He scores his second Heineken in two games! (Heineken doesn't actually sponsor the top scorer of the week anymore - no one does - but I'll continue to call it that until I come up with a better name... no Russell, not Brockovich). Eddy also maintains his slim Starling Cup lead over DanFran.

Eddy took down Dean, who is the unlucky loser so far, with the second-highest point total in the league but an 0-2 record. Hopefully things even out for him in the end. On the flipside, Drew had the second-lowest score of the week but still beat reigning champ Amer, who laid a rare egg.

Jason missed Heineken by just 0.40 points, but that was plenty to take down Tsunami and move into second place. Russell notched his first win of the season in a close game against Matt.

Montoya

Dan keeps his top spot with a 50-point thrashing of Andrew. Gina continues her Eddy-like road to redemption with a 50-point thrashing of her own, over Scott, to hold down second place.

Lisa scores this week's Heineken on her way to crushing me by 40 points. And we haven't even gotten to the biggest win of the week. Hubert smacked down reigning champ Jeremy by 55 points, even though he was only the fifth-highest scorer this week.

Markinson

I scored this week's Heineken with a rare win over Hubert, only my second against him in eight tries. It vaults me into second place, just a point shy of Amer, who remains in first after beating Matt.

Dean notched a big win over Scott for his first win of the season. And speaking of big wins, Jason crushed Jeremy by 61, putting Jeremy on the losing end of the two biggest spreads of the week. Ouch. Jason is in third place but only 8 points back of first-place Amer. Jason's also the only one this week with two wins.

Record Watch

Scott lost most of his 100-point lead in career points after a bad week in both leagues. Dean is now only a few points back.

Jason is climbing the career wins ladder with 4 wins in two weeks, as many wins as the three guys ahead of him combined. He may make a run at Dean's record of 22 wins in a season.

This week I tied Hubert's record for longest Markinson win streak at six.

On the flipside, Amer's record win streak in Dufresne came to an end at six.

The longest active win streak in each premier league is now four by DanFran and two by Eddy and Jason.

Week 1 Update

Welcome to Season 3 of Markinson Cup! Third season, second Dufresne replacement. First order of business is to introduce the new guy, Nalu Kaahaaina. He was my freshman RA at Stanford and the first guy to think it was a good idea to sleep out for basketball games. Team name: Tsunami. You see, that's clever, because Nalu is Hawaiian for wave, which is his usual nickname, but I guess he felt the need to go big here.

Dufresne

Good start on that front, with a big inaugural win over Dufresne's big dog, Dean. But the most noteworthy win was Eddy's. Worst to first? So far so good. He takes the week one lead for Starling, and he does it with yet another NA in his starting lineup. No surprise, Amer, and Jason also won.

Montoya

Gina starts the season with a win for the first time. DanFran tops the standings, and what a surprise, Hubert and Scott won, too. Stop the presses. They both move to 3-0 in season openers.

Markinson

Amer takes the early lead, backing up his prediction of bi-league dominance. He and Jason are the only ones to start both leagues 1-0, and he and Jer make the Markinson newbies undefeated. The reigning champ...hey, that's me!...also won.